Anti-domestic violence group holds series of shul lectures

Penny Krowitz

Act To End Violence Against Women (ATEVAW), a non-profit organization that serves female victims of domestic abuse, is holding a four-day lecture series to educate the community about the often hidden reality of abuse in Jewish families.

Penny Krowitz, executive director of ATEVAW, which works mostly with Jewish women and operates a kosher women’s shelter, said “Behind Closed Doors – Shattering the Myths about Domestic Violence in the Jewish Community,” being held from Nov. 14 to 17, will shed light on the issue.

“I really, really feel so strongly about helping people understand what constitutes abuse,” Krowitz said.

She said the idea for the four-day event came about last fall when ATEVAW began meeting with rabbis from local synagogues to inform them about its work in case rabbis are approached by congregants who allege abuse, or to offer its services if synagogues wanted to offer programming on the subject.

She said her experience is that rabbis of all denominations have been equally receptive to learning about the issue and educating their congregations about it.

Krowitz said the lecture series is modelled after Holocaust Education Week. “This shouldn’t be a one-off kind of thing. It has to be ongoing, and we really need to open up the public discourse in the Jewish community about it,” she said.

Panel discussions will be held in four GTA locations – Aish Thornhill Community Shul, Beth Emeth Bais Yehuda Congregation in North York, Beth Tzedec Congregation in midtown Toronto and First Narayever Congregation downtown – in order to make them accessible to as many community members as possible.

READ: SPOUSAL ABUSE VICTIM USES EXPERIENCE TO HELP OTHERS

At each of the lectures, which are free to attend, the host rabbi will talk about the issue from a religious perspective, a Jewish survivor of domestic abuse will share her story, and a social worker will talk about how to process the abusive relationship so they can have healthy relationships in the future.

Krowitz said it was important to have moderators “who are respected in the community,” including CTV reporter Naomi Parness, human rights advocate Karen Mock, CJN editor Yoni Goldstein and Jewish Family & Child executive director Brian Prousky.

“The idea is to make noise by having it four nights in a row, shatter the myths, tell people exactly what [abuse] looks like, invite people to get involved, invite people to come for help if they need help – really it is about opening the conversation up,” Krowitz said.

One of the biggest myths is that if you are not being physically assaulted, you’re not suffering abuse. “There’s emotional abuse, financial abuse, psychological abuse, whatever it may be… I put physical at the bottom of the list, because physical abuse is an escalation… it never starts out that way,” she said.

Krowitz hopes to see a cross section of the community at the events – “men, women, young adults from all walks of life. I know there will be people in the audience who have experienced abuse.

READ: COMBATING DOMESTIC VIOLENCE IN THE JEWISH COMMUNITY

“I always have men in the audience who stand up and say, ‘Men are abused, too.’ I don’t deny that at all,” Krowitz said, explaining that ATEVAW is an organization that supports women.

“Statistics support the fact that women are abused in far greater numbers than men… My bottom line is that everyone deserves peace in their relationship. Everyone deserves to have contentment in their relationships. Relationships shouldn’t have fear as part of it.”

She said education about abuse is that much more important when children are involved. “Children feel it, see it, repeat it. We see that so often. So often children who come out of an abusive home go on to repeat the behaviour because that is what they know and that is what they’ve seen and that is their normal, and that’s very scary. We really hope to break the cycle and that it what we are trying to do through education.”


For more, visit www.acttoendvaw.org.