The look on my sister Audrey’s face said it all, and it wasn’t good. I had the best of intentions, and well to say the least, things did not work out the way I had hoped.

Masada Siegel, left, and her sister Audrey

A day of fun I had planned turned into years of merciless teasing. It led me to decide it was time to make amends. The Four Seasons Hotel in Scottsdale, Ariz., held the possibility for my salvation and for complete and total redemption.

Forgiveness in Judaism is no simple task, as it requires taking responsibility, owning up to one’s mistakes and truly being sorry for actions that cause harm. Even more challenging is the directness: one must ask the person offended for their forgiveness and hope for a positive outcome.

“The Jewish concept of repentance requires asking for forgiveness when one’s sin is against another person. At the same time, it encourages the aggrieved party to forgive, assuming the request is sincere.” Yeshiva University’s Rabbi Yosef Blau explained.

My sister is my best friend. While she’s playful, she’s certainly no pushover. Over the past few years, every time I mentioned spending quality time relaxing with Audrey, she would grin at me and playfully say, “Will I be getting another plastic card, and do I need to shave my legs?”

A few years ago, I had the brilliant idea to take my hardworking sister for a relaxing spa day. I called the spa, and they informed me of a few new treatments, so being carefree, I casually decided to book them.

Excited about some sisterly bonding, I called Audrey and told her about the fun activity I had planned. With her non-stop hectic life of working full time, cooking every meal for her family and raising two kids, not to mention her charity work, she richly deserved some downtime and relaxation.

“I was so looking forward to relaxing, and it had been ages since I had a massage, especially at such an exclusive spa. I got showered and dressed and we headed over to the hotel,” Audrey recalled.

“We were ushered into the locker room. Masada was given a luxurious, fluffy white robe with cute flip-flops, while I was instructed that I didn’t even need to remove my boots.”

Tears started to well up in my eyes, and I burst out laughing while I listened to Audrey recount the story.

“I looked at Masada and wondered, what could she have possibly gotten me into this time? But, being open-minded, I followed instructions,” she continued. “Lo and behold, not only was I placed on a table, but I was strapped down. I wondered what kind of torture chamber this was, and how exactly this was going to be relaxing?”

Audrey paused while I tried to regain my composure during this interview, then she went on.

“The ‘masseuse’ then attached my finger to a machine, and placed headphones playing eerie music on my head. I was told to stay still for the next 30 minutes. I attempted to relax while the machine collected random data on what I am not exactly sure.”

Grinning at Audrey, I asked, “Was there anything positive about the experience?

She looked at me as if I had fallen out of a tree. “The woman returned to the room, unstrapped me and handed me a plastic card and recommended I sleep with it under my pillow to ensure good energy. I was speechless, Audrey said. “Needless to say, when I saw you, I was still suffering from fluffy white robe envy.”

In Judaism, the only person who could forgive me, and possibly end years of teasing, was my sister. But, in making my amends, I took it a step further and decided to get Audrey the fluffy white robe treatment she deserved.

This time, I carefully consulted with Audrey and sent her the link to the spa of the Four Seasons website. There was no way I was going to make the same mistake twice.

Rabbi Blau said, “Judaism sees doing kindness and being merciful as fundamental Jewish characteristics that should cause people to be quick to forgive. Repairing the damage between people is part of our loving our neighbours and respecting human dignity.”

So I thought to attempt another act of kindness and hoped my sister would be merciful! I picked Audrey up and drove through the picturesque desert dotted with saguaros. After we arrived to the Four Seasons, which is nestled between magnificent mountains, we were warmly welcomed at the spa.

The woman at the spa’s front desk  handed us locker keys, and Audrey giggled as she pulled out her luxurious white robe, while I breathed a sigh of relief.

Audrey said, “I was happy to be issued my fluffy robe and was optimistic about this adventure’s outcome. This time, as I waited for the massage therapists to come get us for our treatments, the stress started to melt away. The 80-minute massage was the ultimate in relaxation and rejuvenation.”

After our massages, Audrey and I spent time in the lounge drinking tea and laughing in the steam room and sauna.

It was a magical day. We wandered around the resort – I kid you not, bunny rabbits scampered by and quails flew overhead. The sun beamed down as we enjoyed a delectable Mexican-inspired lunch at the Crescent Moon restaurant.

While I was sipping my cappuccino, I noticed Audrey had not been this relaxed for years. I thought perhaps I finally redeemed myself into good graces with my sister, so I figured it would be a good time to investigate.

I asked, “Do you forgive me for the fiasco spa experience?”

Audrey giggled. “There was nothing to forgive. I knew you did not ‘arrange’ the torture-chamber experience for me. I was never mad at you in the first place!”

I breathed a sigh of relief and asked, “Well, then, will the teasing finally stop?”

She burst out laughing and said, “No! Are you kidding? It’s too good of a story, and what are sisters for anyway?”

Masada Siegel can be reached at [email protected].